Red Stunk

I hope this makes you feel better

As many of you die-hard St. John’s fans out there know (wait, are there any diehard Saint John’s fans out there?), it’s been 11 long years since Gonzaga derailed St Johns in the NCAA Tourney, crushing my 12-year-old heart.  All day I sat in my office with thoughts of revenge.  I was more anxious than Lindsay Lohan’s Dad at a child custody hearing as I pretended to be interested in the other games.   Finally, game-time.  Bar-time.  After St John’s got off to a hot start I was already thinking about BYU.  It only took one quick beer to create a time vortex placing me back on my grandmother’s couch, with visions of upsets running through my mind.  St John’s was over-anxious, running around like drunken toddlers.  The Red Storm were so eager to play defense they forgot to guard half of the court.  A backdoor cut here, a wide-open three there (which Gonzaga hit at a 60% clip) and I quickly realized this game was over before it had begun.  All I could do was picture my boss’ face as he questioned whether I was drunk when I said the Storm could make a deep run this year.  (No, never on the job.)  But apparently I was drunk on Wednesday when I penciled in Steve Lavin’s squad to reach the Final Four.  The tale of the tape tonight was rebounding.  The overzealous Johnnies were so out-of-place on D that it led to a -23 rebounding margin.  Not a snowball’s chance in hell.  Boys it was great to see you here, but please don’t take another 11 agonizing years to make it back again.