90 on 95

Sports, rumors, and humor from the Ben Franklin to the George Washington

The Return of Dom


Guess who's back, back again

Ahhhhh the return of the prophecy known as Domonic.  With the Phillies offense looking more like a bad triple A squad as of late, the Phil’s management decided to quit fucking around with the likes of Michael Martinez and called up the golden boy.  The punch less Phillies offense is in desperate need of help given the fact that every time I turn around someone else is getting hurt, and the shitty fact that everyone seems to be slumping collectively.  After last night’s Jason Giambi style gang rape performance on the likes of Kyle and Danys, I wanted to see what Charlie had to say in his post game presser.  Well before we got to hear Chuck in his West Virginia drawl, we got to hear from the man himself, Ruben Amaro Jr.  He first said that Fat Joe had some elbow soreness which led to Kyle starting the game.  He then mentioned that the grounded Hawaiian’s hamstring is a little worse than expected.  This got everyone’s attention in the room and set off this round of questioning to Rube:

More after the Jump

Don't fuck with me

Reporter # 1

So with Shane being put on the DL, will this lead to Domonic Brown being called up?

Rube

No he isn’t ready

Reporter # 2

Really he isn’t ready?

Rube

Hey Murphy shut the fuck up before I break your face!

Ok ok it didn’t really go like that but you could tell Ruben was FUMING mad about the way his offense has been performing and didn’t really have time to make an honest decision on Dom.  Charlie took the stand next and was subjected to questions about why his team can’t hit and why Joe is fat and has a bad elbow.  He was probably more pissed than anybody though given the fact that he LOVES his hitting.  Now im not exactly sure how the decision was made to call Dom up but im pretty sure it went something like this:

"No i cant take the glasses off Charlie! Then lasers will shoot out!"

Charlie

So uh Rube uh are we uh gonna call up Dom?

Rube

No I don’t think hes ready yet Charlie, he needs some more swings

Charlie

THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY IM PUTTING THAT COCO CRISP WANNABE OUT IN CENTER AGAIN!

Rube

Ok Charlie calm down we will consider it

Charlie

IF I HAVE TO MAKE ANOTHER LINEUP CARD WITH THE NAMES GLOAD,MARTINEZ,VALDEZ, SARDHINA, AND FRANCISCO IM GONNA FUCKING KILL KENDRICK!

Rube

Charlie I said we would think about it!

Charlie

You bet your sweet ass you will

Well let’s hope that Dom can add a little pop to the Phil’s for the weekend series against the Rangers and throughout the rest of the year.  With Domonic and Chase almost back, it looks like slowly but surely the Phil’s may soon have their real lineup in place.  Then we can all complain about how we need to trade for someone.  But until then lets be happy at the beginning of what should be a solid career for Dom.

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