NFL Picks: Week 3

Week Two
Straight up: 13-3
Spread: 9-5-2

Season
Straight up: 23-9
Spread: 16-12-4

New England Patriots (-8.5) Buffalo Bills

Could it be? The Buffalo Bills may actually be decent. Their offense looks realllll good. But their defense did just give up 35 points to the Oakland Raiders. And let’s be serious its the Buffalo Bills. Have fun Mr. Brady. Patriots 42 Bills 31

Miami Dolphins (+2.5) Cleveland Browns

Once the Phillies playoff run is over I’m going into a sports coma for a while. Maybe the Dolphins will actually show up on the road as they have done in past seasons. If not I’m picking against them every week for the rest of the year. Dolphins 20 Browns 16

More picks after the jump.

New York Giants (+9) Philadelphia Eagles

Has the Mike Vick Experience broken down??!?!?!? No Fear it’s the Mike Kafka experience!

If Vick does play it will be interesting to see how effective he will be. The G-Men are coming off a short week but they played well against the Redskins. Expect them to beat up Vick (if he does play) and take advantage of a struggling Eagles defense. Giants 21 Eagles 20

San Francisco 49ers (+3) Cincinnati Bengals

*Flips a coin* 49ers 23 Bengals 20

Jacksonville Jaguars (+3.5) Carolina Panthers

Two rookie QB’s. 1st overall pick vs. 10th overall pick. Both teams have cats as their mascots. Hmmmmm very interesting. Panthers 30 Jags 20

Denver Broncos (+6.5) Tennessee Titans

I remember writing some wild stuff about how old Matt Hasselbeck is in my picks last week. I am still absolutely shocked how they beat the Ravens. It just doesn’t make sense to me. Now they get a great lay up against the Broncos. How is this man not your QB. Honestly. The Broncos are doing a great job of showing other teams how to properly say, Fuck you fans. Titans 32 Broncos 20

Side note on Tebow. This is an amazing shirt worn by some lady who is kinda amazing looking as well. Look at the old woman sitting behind her. Just an all around great photo.

Detroit Lions (-3.5) Minnesota Vikings

This one has potential to be a season defining victory for the Detroit Lions. Tough road matchup against a veteran Vikings team, it’ll be interesting to see how the young Lions hand this game. I think they’ll cruise. Lions 29 Vikings 14

Houston Texans (+4) New Orleans Saints

Points! Saints 42 Texans 34

Kansas City Chiefs (+14.5) San Diego Chargers

Poor Chiefs fans. They just are really, really, really bad right now and there is no end in sight for the misery. I mean just look at this guy. Chargers 40 Chiefs 10

New York Jets (-3.5) Oakland Raiders

Fuck the Jets….That’s my only logic behind this pick. Raiders 13 Jets 10

Baltimore Ravens (-4) St. Louis Rams

Damn Baltimore. They cost me my one survivor entry and they cost me $250 from a weekly pick em pool. Not too happy with them right now. Ravens 20 Rams 19

Arizona Cardinals (-3.5) Seattle Seahawks

Seattle and Kansas City are going to be battling it out for the worst record in the NFL season, you can mark that down. The Cardinals have had two tight games and traveling to Seattle may be a challenge for them. Cardinals 24 Seahawks 20

Atlanta Falcons (+1.5) Tampa Bay Buccaneers

TampaBay has looked horrific so far this season and a loss this week could already severely hurt their chances at making the playoffs. The Falcons overcame the Mike Vick experience for a huge win over the Eagles and will continue to roll against the struggling Bucs. Falcons 28 Bucs 17

Green Bay Packers (-3.5) Chicago Bears

Aaron Rodgers is what all men should want to be. Mr. Jay Cutler…..not so much. Its possible that he may get sacked one of these games and he’ll become the first QB to ever just walk off the field and say fuck it I quit. He may get hit 45 times this weekend. Packers 28 Bears 19

Pittsburgh Steelers (-10.5) Indianapolis Colts

Yup. Steelers 31 Colts 10

Washington Redskins (+5.5) Dallas Cowboys

Banged up Romo, banged up Felix Jones and a hungry Redskins team means the Cowboys are in trouble. Rex Grossman may be right, the Skins may be the best team in the NFC East! No, they’ll screw up somewhere down the road, but I like this matchup for them. Redskins 28 Cowboys 17