90 on 95

Sports, rumors, and humor from the Ben Franklin to the George Washington

NFL Picks: Week 15


Last Week
Straight up: 12-4
Spread: 9-7

Season
Straight up: 139-69
Spread: 102-97-9

Christmas season so these are gonna be quickies.

Jacksonville (+12.5) Atlanta

This game already happened so I have to get it right! For realsies I picked this one before the game. I promise. Scout’s honor. Falcons 31 Jags 14

Dallas (-7) Tampa Bay

Wait a tick. Tampa Bay just lost by 27 points to Jacksonville. Yes, Jacksonville. Cowboys 28 Bucs 16

Green Bay (-13.5) Kansas City

The Packers will go 16-0. Unless they get all gay and bench their starters. Which also will make Vegas/me implode. Packers 34 Chiefs 13

Carolina (+6) Houston

Come on. T.J. Yates cannot keep winning games. It defies everything I was brought up on. Panthers 24 Texans 21

Seattle (+3.5) Chicago

See above, replace Yates with Hanie. Seahawks 17 Bears 13

New Orleans (-7) Minnesota

Gayest picture of the 2011-12 NFL season award goes to…….

Saints 27 Vikings 18

Cincinnati (-6.5) St. Louis

Since when did Sam Bradford turn into the worst QB I’ve ever seen???? I watched the whole MNF game (only because I had money on it) and good God Bradford looks like a little school boy bitch out there. Bengals 23 Rams 10

Miami (-1) Buffalo

Can we start the #suckforBarkley campaign now? Bills 23 Dolphins 14

Tennessee (-6.5) Indianapolis

I’d say Indy has to win a game sooner or later, but they are one hor-awful team. Titans 23 Colts 13

Washington (+6.5) NY Giants

Everything about this game just screams trap. Thoughts Eli?

Hm. Okay. Giants 34 Redskins 26

Detroit (-1) Oakland

Hey let’s put two teams who love being stupid on the same field. I’m pretty sure the over/under on personal fouls is set around 14. However, it finally returns!!!

Ndamukongzilla will make a difference. Lions 40 Raiders 28

New England (-7.5) Denver

I had a vision the other day about why I’m picking the Patriots. If I were a reporter and I asked the two QB’s playing in this game how they plan on preparing for this game, this is how I envision their responses.

"What a great question!!!!!!! I'm going to read at least 150 verses from the bible and pray all Saturday night!"

VERSUS

"Me? Yeah, I'll go out Saturday night have 5 or 6 gin and tonics and try to slay the hottest bitch in the bar"

I trust Tom more. Pats 34 Broncos 20

Cleveland (+6.5) Arizona

Yawn. Cardinals 24 Browns 17

NY Jets (+3) Philadelphia

Timmy P’s survivor pick alert! Sadly, I have to take the dream team. I’m worried. Real worried. I just need this man to show up!

Eagles 24 Jets 20

Baltimore (-2.5) San Diego

Last time Baltimore did a funk west coast trip was against Seattle and they got absolutely slaughtered. The Chargers have won two straight games….but against Jacksonville/Buffalo….This spread is low only because of Baltimore’s blow up against Seattle. The Chargers aren’t good. However, I do kind of feel like the Admiral…

Traps aren’t fun, but I trust that Baltimore is going to put it to the Chargers. Terrell Suggs may have 14 sacks. Ravens 23 Chargers 14

Pittsburgh (+2.5) San Francisco 

Big Ben on one foot is wayyyyyy better then a two footed Charlie Batch, but I don’t think it’s worth the Steelers to risk playing the rapist Roethlisberger. It’s possible the Steelers defense could win the game on their own. 49ers 17 Steelers 13

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: