Please baby Jesus make it happen. Dick exploding? That would ben an understatement Joseph Auger. I love football, but the Dolphins absolutely sucking the past 10 years has made me say, “fuck you football”. Of course I love gambling on it and fantasy football but the actual rooting for a team part of it? Eh. However, that lovely young (by that I mean old as hell) gentlemen in the blue up there would instantly make me fall in love with the Dolphins again. Does it matter that his neck has potential to explode at any point???? Of course not it’s Peyton Fucking Manning! Let’s look at who has played quarterback for the Dolphins since the great #13 retired. Warning: You will probably not remember any of these people because every single one of them ABSOLUTELY SUCKED when on the Dolphins.
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